If It Had Been Dark
by Tresa Cho
Summary: Hakkai rescues a young man who is more than he seems.
1. Chapter One

Standard disclaimers apply. If I owned Hakkai, trust me, I would do more than just write about him.

If It Had Been Dark 

If it had been dark, they never would have seen him.

They never would have stopped.

They never would have tried to help.

If only it had been dark…

And yet they did see him. Hakkai spun the jeep to a stop, spraying gravel and dust clouds in their wake. For a moment they all sat there, wondering if he was dead or alive. Goku was leaning forward, nearly hanging out the jeep. Gojyo saw at once that it was a man and turned his attention elsewhere. Sanzo grunted in annoyance at the stop but said nothing.

"Hey, Hakkai," Goku finally broke the silence, "Why did you stop?"

"Don't you find that a bit odd, Goku?" the brunette murmured, nodding to the man on the floor of the forest.

"He's hugging the tree! Is that wrong?" Goku looked again.

Hugging the tree was a bit of an understatement. A massive oak towered above them, stretching its limbs into the dark night. At the base of its trunk, lay the victim. He was tangled into the roots of the tree. Tangled very deeply. In Goku's eyes, it was a mere hug, but Hakkai could see the person was trapped in the roots. He looked to Sanzo.

"Don't look at me, bastard. You do what you want. Just don't come crying to me when you're in deep shit," the monk slouched further in the passenger seat, twirling a cigarette with his tongue.

Hakkai shut off the jeep and opened the door. He stepped onto the forest grass, and paused. This man was different, somehow. His chi read differently than any Hakkai had seen before. It wasn't automatically dangerous, yet there was something cautious in the way it moved. Hakkai took a step back, debating what to do.

"Hakkai, is something wrong?" Gojyo muttered from the backseat.

"No." It was a lie, but Hakkai wasn't about to climb back into the car and leave the man. Trying to shake off the bad feeling he had, the youkai moved towards the roots of the tree and started prying them apart with his chi.

"Sanzo! I'm hungry!" Goku whined as Hakkai worked.

"Shut up, you stupid ape."

"But Sanzo! We haven't eaten in four hours!"

"I said shut up."

"Sanzo! Sanzo!"

The noise behind him escalated, as Hakkai delved further into the tree's roots. He finally freed a path, and was reaching for the man's arm, when a pair of luminescent brown eyes flashed open. Hakkai started, pulling his hand back. The man had awoken, and was staring intently at the other.

Those eyes…

Quickly recovering his poise, Hakkai smiled as always, "Hello. Sorry for startling you. If you'll give me your hand, I can help you out."

The man reached out his arm, and Hakkai pulled him from the remnants of the tree prison, trying not to writhe noticeably under the other's touch. Something just wasn't right.

The boy looked a mere year or two younger than Hakkai himself. He stood straight, and looked around. Dark brown hair fell over his eyes messily, and flakes of tree bark hung from the slender strands. He shook his hair with a fair hand, and Hakkai noticed how thin the boy was.  His build was small, like that of a lithe woman.

He silently brushed himself off, with the rest of the group watching intently. Hakkai tried to keep himself from shifting uncomfortably in the silence. He walked to the jeep and hopped back in, smiling at the man, "Take care not to get too close to anymore trees." The man said nothing as he continued to stare blankly at the four. "Do you… need a ride to the next town?" the words slipped out before Hakkai could stop them. Damn his politeness.

Taking it as an invitation, the man stepped forward and stood at Sanzo's door. Hakkai looked from Sanzo to the stranger. "Sanzo," Hakkai said, "I believe he intends to take your seat."

"Go to hell."

Hakkai shrugged, smiling, "I'm afraid you'll have to sit in the back with Gojyo and Goku."

The man said nothing as Goku pulled him into the backseat. "Hakkai! Food!" the young one yelled.

"All right, all right," Hakkai chuckled, "The next stop is the town. We can eat there."

"Yes!"


	2. Chapter Two

The town was remarkably silent, as all ominous things are. Hakkai retired immediately to the room he shared with Sanzo at the hotel, claiming fatigue. Sanzo had to sit through dinner with Gojyo, Goku, and the silent stranger. Amazingly, only three rounds were fired, and none of the other diners were injured.

Goku ran out of the restaurant with a giant smile on his tan face, "That was great! I'm up for another!"

Gojyo pulled a cigarette from the pack, and set it in place on his lips, "I won't be back tonight, monkey. You have the room to yourself."

The boy blinked, "Won't be back? Why?"

Gojyo merely hit the monkey over the head and walked away. Sanzo exited the dinner area behind Goku, followed by their temporary companion. Goku felt the urge to declare his vocal abilities to the town that night, and walked singing back to the hotel. Once again, only three rounds were fired, but this time Sanzo broke a window and hit a dog.

Sanzo walked up the backstairs to get to his room. He had let Goku alone to find his own bed. When the blonde opened the door, Hakkai was sitting up at the window at the far end of the room, staring out at the courtyard below. The room wasn't big, but it comfortably held two people. Neither bed had a wall against its side, and both headboards were up against the wall. The window was the only light in the room; Hakkai had turned off the lamp. A single table rested at the wall opposite the beds. Sanzo meandered over to it to place his traveling bag on it.

"Welcome back, Sanzo," Hakkai murmured absently. It was automatic to just say whatever politeness required.

The monk grunted in response, shrugging out of his outer robes. He sat on one of the two beds in the room, leaning back against the headboard. The dark room provided the atmosphere of reflection and thought. Sanzo tipped his head back and closed his eyes. Driving all day had not made him tired. In fact, he was rather restless right now. He couldn't even think of sleeping yet.

"Sanzo, you're not allowed to smoke in this building," Hakkai didn't even need to turn from the window to know that Sanzo had a cigarette draped in his lips.

"Go to hell."

The youkai fell silent. Sanzo cast a glance at him from the corner of his eye. Something wasn't right. That brunette was being quieter than normal. The way he had his head tipped towards the windowpane hinted that he was tired. But he was still standing by the window. Did he want to talk about something?

"Stop it," Sanzo grunted at the form at the window, "You're pissing me off. What do you want?"

"It's nothing."

"Sure as hell. Spill it and stop wasting my time."

Hakkai turned away from the window, his eyes half-lidded with what looked like despair. Then again, he could have just been tired. Sanzo was not the expert in reading other's emotions. "Sanzo," Hakkai started, "would you shoot me if I became a danger to the journey?"

Without hesitation, Sanzo pulled out his small pistol and pointed it at the other, "I would shoot you dead."

Hakkai smiled warmly, "That's what I thought you would say." He moved for the other bed, having to pass Sanzo's bed in the process. The monk kept the gun trained on him the entire walk, wondering what the hell was going on. Hakkai didn't do anything, but merely slid under the covers of his bed, "Good night, Sanzo."

…*…

A faint aroma of flowers woke Hakkai. He looked around blearily, sensing a presence near him. On top of him would be more accurate. Someone had straddled his stomach in his sleep, and had waited there. Yet in the dark, he couldn't see who it was, and the black seemed to be growing with each passing moment.

The figure leaned forward, stretching itself out on Hakkai's still form. What little light was in the room shown upon a pair of deep brown eyes. Through a haze of thought, Hakkai's consciousness jumped.

Kanaan!


	3. Chapter Three

Sleep slowed his words as he struggled for a handle on reality, "K-Ka…naan…?"

The figure sighed, not in disappointment, but in contentment. A mouth pressed down over Hakkai's, further loosing his shaky consciousness into a pleasant oblivion. It was all her. Her taste, her scent, her eyes. It was her.

No. She was dead.

But here she was, making love to him. Kissing him so sweetly he thought he should cry.

She was gone.

She was here.

A hand passed over the scar on his stomach, working its way down, and startling his eyes open. The second hand was playing with his left ear, twirling his brown hair and tickling the skin. He could feel himself clawing out of sleep, desperately trying to figure out what the hell was going on. But his eyelids only opened halfway. His limbs would not move. He could not call to Sanzo, his voice would not work.

"Sa…n…" in reward for his attempt at speech, lips covered his again, swallowing his words.

It had to be an attack.

A youkai had stolen the form of Kanaan to trick him. It was dirty, and something that their enemies would do. He had let his guard down, and he was going to die for it.

The hand that had rested near his ear suddenly became active, clicking at his limiters. A sudden panic gripped him. The first one fell away easily.

No. He had let his guard down and Sanzo was going to die for it.

If his youkai blood was released now, he wouldn't be able to stop himself. Not when he was nearly unconscious in his human form. He would be unleashed upon Sanzo, the only other occupant in the room. And the other was sleeping still, not having heard any of the motion that the intruder was making. He wouldn't wake in time.

Hakkai mustered all his energy and managed to move his arm enough to grasp the offending wrist. It wasn't a strong grip, but enough to make the enemy pause. Again, lips touched his gently, whispering love against them and soothing his troubled mind.

The second limiter fell away.

Hot blood coursed through him. Hakkai grimaced under the other's ministrations, knowing that it was his youkai chi. He couldn't let it out. Not here. Not with Sanzo in the room. Not Sanzo…

The third limiter clicked, and dropped from his ear.


	4. Chapter Four

Groans and the shuffle of clothing pulled Sanzo into wakefulness in the middle of the night. Cursing to himself, for he had no strength to even speak yet, he turned his bleary eyes to the bed beside him.

It was just Hakkai.

Getting it on.

Sanzo blinked, and cocked an eyebrow. That… wasn't right…

Scowling, he struggled into a sitting position. Quietly he cocked his gun. Taking careful aim, so as not to hit the youkai on the bottom, he fired a single shot.  It caught the intruder's arm, knocking her off the bed and onto the floor.

Aside from the gun smoke, he could smell something else. Flowers? He glanced around the room. There was nothing in the room that gave off that scent. No. The flower scent turned into a putrid reek. Sanzo covered his mouth and nose with a sleeve of his robe, and stood from the bed. The thing he had shot turned out to be a male. It was the boy they had rescued from the forest. He glared up at the monk with hatred in his brown eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Sanzo grunted, "You have two seconds." He cocked his gun.

"I don't think you should be worried about me," the young man sneered.

Sanzo curtly smiled, "Really. Then I won't." He pointed the gun, but before he had a chance to fire, a claw snaked around the head of the one on the floor. The frightened intruder let out a loud yell, before being thrown into the far wall.

Sanzo didn't turn to see if he had lived. What seethed before him was more important.

Longish brown hair covered a familiar face. Pointed ears to go along with the clawed hands. An open shirt revealed a vine-like pattern cut across the chest, covering a scar so deep it touched the heart.

Hakkai had taken off his limiters.

Sanzo stepped back from the bed, wondering if the youkai had noticed him yet. The answer was an obvious yes as the brunette launched out of the bed, hands outstretched to take the monk's throat. Sanzo dove out of the way, rolling and cocking his gun. He crouched on the ground where he had landed, and thrust the point of the gun at Hakkai's raging form.

"Hakkai," he ordered, "Put your limiters back on."

The youkai was beyond speech. He growled menacingly, and approached the blonde. Sanzo dropped the gun's view and shot the floor near Hakkai's feet, raising the weapon again in one solid motion. "I said, put your limiters back on." A quick glance at the bed revealed the named clasps lying on the pillow. The bed was out of his reach, however. If he could distract the other, and have enough time to grab the earpieces, he might have a chance. But in this form, Hakkai was much faster than his human body. He was also stronger, slightly taller, and much uglier.

Sanzo raised the gun just a bit, and fired a shot at Hakkai's shoulder. The bullet hit, causing the youkai to howl in pain. The monk promptly leapt from his spot and made a grab for the limiters. His fingers closed around the silvery metal just as Hakkai's claws pierced his back.

**A/N**- Just a warning, because I think it may be mandatory now, but this story is going to become shonen-ai, which means boy loves boy relationships. If that makes you queasy in any way, please don't read on.

And I also wanted to thank my reviewers, and for you, Veszelyite, I'd like to explain that Hakkai is under a sort of spell, and that's where the smell of flowers comes from. That's also why he's a bit dense… I probably should have made that clearer. My apologies. It was painful, because Hakkai is obviously the smartest one of them all… Sumimasen!


	5. Chapter Five

He fell hard on the bed. He gasped, partially from the pain, and the other part in pure shock that Hakkai would raise a hand to him. The momentary stun lasted until the youkai ripped his claw back, ready for another strike. Before he could land a killing blow, Sanzo flipped onto his back and grabbed Hakkai by the hair.

"You bastard," he spat, heedless of the blood in his mouth, "You said you'd bite your tongue rather than betray me. Lie to me will you?" He clapped the pieces onto Hakkai's ears, jerking the other's head to the side just in spite. The youkai ears shrunk, and his fangs dulled. With a groan, he slumped down on top of the bloodied monk, trembling. Sanzo let his arms fall to the side, breathing hard against the pain in his back. Each intake of breath was met by Hakkai's equally shaking shudder.

"S-Sanzo…" Hakkai whispered, his breath catching in his chest. "San…zo…"

"Stop talking," Sanzo gasped, "Just shut up."

Hakkai shook his head, bringing his arms around Sanzo's neck, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"I said shut the hell up," the monk grunted. He didn't have the strength to move his arms at all. If the human Hakkai was disturbing when mad, youkai form was nearly a hundredfold more dangerous. He was the strongest of the group, aside from Goku, as a youkai. The human body pressing on top of him was easing on his conscious, it was all so familiar to him. The bare chest was without vines, and while his hair was still longish, it was matted with sweat as if after a tough fight. It was so familiar. He wouldn't have minded at all if they had stayed like that all night, without any more demonic interruptions. Yet the sheets under him were starting to get warm with his blood, making the position uncomfortable to say the least.

The brunette lifted his head from its sorrowful position at the nape of Sanzo's neck to look the blonde in the eye. A slick trail of wetness lined his cheekbone, and his eyes glittered in a way Sanzo had never seen before. "I said stop…" Sanzo lifted his hand to brush at the salty streaks.

"Liar!" Hakkai finally managed to burst out, "You said you'd kill me if I endangered you!"

"Bastard," Sanzo spat, his eyes flashing, "I did not say that."

"You did!" Hakkai buried his head in Sanzo's chest. His faith in Sanzo was gone. Unwilling to protect himself, Sanzo had refused to kill his youkai form. The monk could have been killed- he nearly had been. And why? Why had Sanzo faltered when it was most important?

"I said I'd shoot you if you endangered the travel west," the monk was finding it a struggle to keep his eyes open. "And if it satisfies your masochistic tendencies, I did shoot you… happy?" He dropped his hand from the other's face to the wounded shoulder. Hakkai flinched, as if just noticing it.

The brunette took Sanzo's hand in his own, "Sanzo, I hurt you."

"No… shit…" he could feel his vision blurring as the damn youkai wasted time on top of him.

Hakkai sat up, straddling the monk's waist. He rested his trembling hands over Sanzo's wound, which reached his front. The soft green glow soothed Sanzo, as he finally relaxed under the hands of Hakkai. When the healing was done, the brunette sat back, sliding off the other. He lay down on the bed, facing Sanzo.

"Aren't you going to take care of yourself?" Sanzo asked, feeling a new level of grumpiness now that he was healed.

"I'm fine." Blood soaked his shoulder, hinting otherwise. Sanzo pushed himself up and swung his legs out of bed. "Sanzo! You shouldn't be moving yet!" Hakkai gasped, bolting up.

"Shut up and lay down," Sanzo grabbed a roll of bandages from the table, "You are damn annoying."

Hakkai knew it was best not to argue. He reclined in the bed while Sanzo walked back over, kneeling on the blood-soaked sheets. "How are we going to explain this to the inn-keeper?" Hakkai pondered aloud. Sanzo jerked a thumb at the still form lying across the room. It was the enemy who had snuck in and first started the trouble. "Oh. I guess that will work. We will have to pay for the damage."

"It's taken care of. Stop worrying about that." Sanzo pulled a long strip off the roll and cut it with his teeth, glaring at Hakkai the whole time. "Off with the shirt," he growled finally, holding the bandage impatiently.

"Yes sir," Hakkai couldn't stop the smile that crept over his face as he shirked the dirty clothing.

The monk looked and the wound and nearly flinched. It was deep, his survival instinct must have taken over when he had shot. It was too late to change it now, he just had to fix it. Hakkai held his arm up so Sanzo could wrap the bandage around his chest and shoulder. "This is your fault, you know?" Sanzo finally spoke, breaking the silence.

"Yes."

"You were the one who wanted to stop."

"I know."

The blonde sat back, glaring at the other, "You knew he was going to try something, didn't you? Otherwise you wouldn't have asked me before we slept. If you knew, then why didn't you say something?"

"You wouldn't have helped me, Sir Monk," Hakkai smiled irritatingly.

It was a good thing his eyes were closed. Sanzo wasn't sure he wanted to see what was in them. Hakkai hadn't said anything because he had wanted to be shot. Dying was his objective, it was obvious. Sanzo taped the white cloth together and rested his hand on the other's back for a bit longer than necessary. He closed his eyes, "Idiot. If you die, then I wouldn't be able to finish the journey. I was specifically ordered to bring you three as luggage on this little adventure. Not the monkey or the water sprite alone. All three of you."

"My, my," Hakkai smiled, "Would the loss of one be such a disaster?"

Sanzo rested his forehead on Hakkai's back, silent.

"Sanzo? Are you okay?" Hakkai tried to twist around to see what had happened.

"The loss of you…" Sanzo muttered, "would be…"


	6. Chapter Six

The youkai stiffened, the grin falling from his face. "Sanzo.?" he breathed.

"Don't talk," the blonde sighed, "Just don't."

Hakkai turned slowly on the bed, to face the other. Sanzo refused to look the other in the eye. Hakkai solved this little problem by bringing his hands up to Sanzo's face and holding his chin up. Sanzo's crystal blue eyes were nearly hidden under furrowed brows, as the blonde scowled beautifully. His lips were turned down in a defiant twist. It was if he dared Hakkai to answer what he had just said.

And he did.

Smiling gently all the while, Hakkai leaned forward and captured the pouting lips in a soft kiss.

To say that Sanzo was surprised was a bit of an understatement. But he was not only surprised. A sense of belonging filled him also, along with an immense feeling of relief. He was out in the open, and now he had nothing to hide from Hakkai.

Encouraged that the other had made the first move, Sanzo pressed hard on Hakkai's lips, pushing him over backwards on the bed. The youkai clenched his teeth and took his breath sharply, startling Sanzo to lift his head. "Are you okay?" he murmured, with just a hint of anxiousness in his voice.

"Why Sanzo," Hakkai smiled, "Are you worried about me?" His shoulder had merely protested at the sudden movement.

"No."

"Really? I could have sworn that's what it sounded like-" Hakkai was cut off by another liplock, just as sweet as the first. Sanzo tasted of gunpowder. It was an odd characteristic, so different from Kanaan's scent of flowers. But it was Sanzo. He was not Kanaan. He moved differently, tasted differently, breathed differently.

Sanzo felt Hakkai slack under him. "Hakkai.?" Sanzo bumped himself up on his elbows to look at the other.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop the damn apologizing. What are you sorry for this time?" Sanzo was getting impatient with Hakkai.

"You're not Kanaan."

The blonde sighed and lowered his head, resting his lips at the nape of Hakkai's neck. He placed a gentle kiss there before speaking, "I can't make you forget her, just as you can't make me forget my past. But, I swear to you, that I will love you as she did."

Hakkai reached up with his good hand and drew it through the mess that Sanzo called hair. He kissed the top of Sanzo's head, "No."

Sanzo's head jerked up, and he glared at Hakkai, "What?"

Hakkai smiled softly, "No. You're different. You can love me like Sanzo, not like Kanaan." He brushed blonde strands from Sanzo's eyes, looking for an excuse to keep touching him.

"Fine," Sanzo inclined his head towards Hakkai's hand, "I'll love you like Sanzo." He leaned down, drawing his tongue over Hakkai's neck, "No calling uncle."

"Agreed," Hakkai hooked the waist of Sanzo's pants with his fingers, drawing the other closer.

.*.

If it had been dark, they never would have seen him.

They never would have stopped.

They never would have found each other.

Perhaps it wasn't so bad that it was light.

**A/N**- That's it, minna-san. Hope you enjoyed!


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